The Unfortunate Tale of Xulon the Dwarf
Disclaimer: Parts of the story are hyperbolised for entertainment value. The characters in the story may not accurate reflect their actual selves. Please be mature and take the information provided with discretion.
Everyone knows that Xulon is short. By human standards, being 4’4” is the equivalent of a child’s height pre-maturity. But with his deep, manly voice and the scruffled ginger beard hanging from the tip of his rounded chin, its hard to believe that the unimaginably tiny gentleman seated behind the screen has yet to reach puberty.
But what if I told you that this was in fact the case?
Unbeknownst to most, Xulon suffers from an acute but rarely seen biological condition which less than ten people in the world are known to be afflicted with. Known colloquially as the “manchild” syndrome, Xulon is not actually a biological dwarf. Rather, his body possesses a higher testosterone count than that of the average human, so high to the point of it triggering puberty at a shockingly early age.
Xulon’s facial hair began to develop at age three, as did his body begin to start constructing muscle mass. This caused significant amounts of bodily growth to be diverted away from the length of his bones and into the size of his muscles. This also led to rapid brain development at a very young age.
But what does this mean?
In truth, Xulon is not short because he is a dwarf. He is short because he is a five year old child who has experienced puberty at a very young age. He has fully developed lower body organs and has a beard of thickness 3 millimetres and length 3 inches.
He has just graduated his final year of kindergarten. As such, the next time you run into him and feel like taking out your rage on him and crushing his self esteem, understand that you are picking on a child. You pathetic and cruel hooligans. Can’t you see he’s just a boy? He doesn’t deserve to have his money taken from him or his Instagram and phone number spread across the community like explicit photographs from an adult film actress.
Please have sympathy for the young. They need guidance and help in today’s increasingly turbulent world. The recent Trump-Biden presidential debates are a mere reflection of how unpredictable our society is becoming. As such, the duty falls upon us, the older, to lead the not so old into the forefront of the unforeseen future.
TLDR: Xulon is short because he is a 5 year old child.
Disclaimer: Parts of the story are hyperbolised for entertainment value. The characters in the story may not accurate reflect their actual selves. Please be mature and take the information provided with discretion.
Everyone knows that Xulon is short. By human standards, being 4’4” is the equivalent of a child’s height pre-maturity. But with his deep, manly voice and the scruffled ginger beard hanging from the tip of his rounded chin, its hard to believe that the unimaginably tiny gentleman seated behind the screen has yet to reach puberty.
But what if I told you that this was in fact the case?
Unbeknownst to most, Xulon suffers from an acute but rarely seen biological condition which less than ten people in the world are known to be afflicted with. Known colloquially as the “manchild” syndrome, Xulon is not actually a biological dwarf. Rather, his body possesses a higher testosterone count than that of the average human, so high to the point of it triggering puberty at a shockingly early age.
Xulon’s facial hair began to develop at age three, as did his body begin to start constructing muscle mass. This caused significant amounts of bodily growth to be diverted away from the length of his bones and into the size of his muscles. This also led to rapid brain development at a very young age.
But what does this mean?
In truth, Xulon is not short because he is a dwarf. He is short because he is a five year old child who has experienced puberty at a very young age. He has fully developed lower body organs and has a beard of thickness 3 millimetres and length 3 inches.
He has just graduated his final year of kindergarten. As such, the next time you run into him and feel like taking out your rage on him and crushing his self esteem, understand that you are picking on a child. You pathetic and cruel hooligans. Can’t you see he’s just a boy? He doesn’t deserve to have his money taken from him or his Instagram and phone number spread across the community like explicit photographs from an adult film actress.
Please have sympathy for the young. They need guidance and help in today’s increasingly turbulent world. The recent Trump-Biden presidential debates are a mere reflection of how unpredictable our society is becoming. As such, the duty falls upon us, the older, to lead the not so old into the forefront of the unforeseen future.
TLDR: Xulon is short because he is a 5 year old child.
