Accepted Abandoned Trainwreck (Easy)

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Quinny

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#2
Hi Chismu,
I'm going to have to give this a -1. The main thing I see with this map is that all of the parkour is floating at that there is no central build. While the floating jumps are decorated really nicely and the theme is okay (although there are maps with trains/locomotives like Thomas, but this is different) , it would be improved a lot by a central build with the parkour on, in, and around it.
Another thing to consider is that there isn't really much jump variety, as all the jumps are normal jumps. Try to mix in other blocks such as fences, flower pots, walls, slabs, stairs, carpets, anvils, trap doors, and other kinds of blocks to make fun and varied parkour. There are a proper amount of jumps for the easy difficulty, so that's good!
I think this theme has a lot of potential if you put some thought into a unique central build! Please note that I am not a staff member and I am just a Mapper and community member who likes to give constructive feedback on submissions to help people improve their skills :)
 
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#3
Hi Chismu,
I'm going to have to give this a -1. The main thing I see with this map is that all of the parkour is floating at that there is no central build. While the floating jumps are decorated really nicely and the theme is okay (although there are maps with trains/locomotives like Thomas, but this is different) , it would be improved a lot by a central build with the parkour on, in, and around it.
Another thing to consider is that there isn't really much jump variety, as all the jumps are normal jumps. Try to mix in other blocks such as fences, flower pots, walls, slabs, stairs, carpets, anvils, trap doors, and other kinds of blocks to make fun and varied parkour. There are a proper amount of jumps for the easy difficulty, so that's good!
I think this theme has a lot of potential if you put some thought into a unique central build! Please note that I am not a staff member and I am just a Mapper and community member who likes to give constructive feedback on submissions to help people improve their skills :)
Hi,
Thank you so much for your critique, I'll make some changes with your suggestions in mind c:
 
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#4
So I made some adjustments based on your feedback.
I added some more variety in the jumps (mainly head hitters, ladder jumps and fence jumps).
I also added a “main structure”, a train falling down from its rails due to them being to old and “rotting away” (I don’t know train terms). I thought this would be a good idea since this would add some vertical parkour to the map which I realized mine lacked.
I will however keep the floating bits. Now I must have misunderstood the guidelines when creating a map, since the quote “Preferably made in a void environment” is a bit confusing. Personally I took this as “if you fall, you should end up in the void” and designed my map after that and I feel to fix this issue I would have to redo the entire map (which I still might do later or I’ll just keep this in mind when designing maps in the future).
Now with these changes my map became quite a bit longer (35 jumps I think?) and I’m unsure if that’s a bit too long for easy and I’m currently considering making this a medium map? A lot of the jumps are definitely too easy medium but I feel like some of the jumps I have now lie more on the medium side.
 

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Quinny

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#5
Hey again!
I do think that the parkour is a bit better, but alas the map is still mostly floating. I see a lot of potential in your building though aside! I would love to show you what I mean by a "central build" in game if you would like. It's a bit easier to show than to explain. I'm online right now at your plot, whisper me in game by doing /msg Quinnyp [message] and I'd love to talk with you more about the build in-game!
 
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#6
So third time's the charm (probably not but anyway), I basically redid everything and just kept the aesthetic and theme. Now I think I managed to get a central build right (and if not I’m actually dumb). It’s currently around 25-30 jumps, might be to little variation but I think it should be fine.
RusticRailwayV3Top.png
 

Quinny

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#7
This third time around IS the charm, because this is awesome! :) +1 from me now all the way. I'm glad I could help you develop this more.
The jumps are varied and very well integrated into the build, the theme is original (abandoned trainwreck) and the jumps fit the difficulty well. The directional signs are clear. I knew this had potential!
I also may be a little biased because it reminds me a lot of the build style I first learned to build in many years ago. Getting to know you a little better today, you've been building as long as I have! You have really good texture variation that I don't see much in other submissions, as well as a great grasp of dimension. It's really nice to see!
 

ThePKFish

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#8
Hello Chismu,

This map is being accepted! the build is lovely and definitely represents its theme. The theme is original, as we do not have a train map like this. The parkour is fun to do and definitely fits the easy difficulty! It's length is good as well! Thank you Quinny for working with them on this course and thank you Chismu for being willing to work on it! Improvement and the ability to take constructive criticism is one of the factors that really makes a mapper. If you create more builds and courses like this in the future, I'm sure you will have mapper in no time. Amazing job!

Thank you for submitting this course! I hope to see more from you in the future! :D
If you have any questions, you may DM me on here, in game or on discord! :D

-Ashley (ThePKFish, fishy1980)
 
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