Rejected Desert Llama - Easy Parkour

[choko_penguiin]

This is my first map submission, so I'm sorry if there is something that I missed. Please let me know if that is the case.
I'm also open to suggestion and opinions from others!


Username: choko_penguiin
Map name: Desert Llama
(I am aware that there is another 'hard' map named llamas, however, the colors and the way we interpreted the theme is completely different)
Difficulty: Easy
Number of checkpoints: 3
Warp: /plot v choko_penguiin 1

Attached are some pictures EDIT: The pictures are no longer completely accurate. I took some advice from others and modified the map.

 

[Bloro]

Hi choke_penguiin, I am here to give my honest opinion on this map. (I am just giving my opinion, this will not affect the final result)
I am going to give this map a -1, which means I think it will get rejected. And here is why.

1. The theme and originality: The theme is not original. There is a Hard map called Llama and a medium map called SpittyAlpaca (;D), the theme is very similar and close to the existing maps, and I think you should read Shinx's map list to check the existing maps first so that you don't clash into other themes of existing maps. Click here to read it.

2. The build: The build doesn't look very nice and smooth. It looks kind of square-y and cube-y. Also it looks like it is copying the Minecraft Llama, which Minecraft themed maps aren't accepted if I remember. I think that you should use more block variations too, like not just using wool.

3. The parkour: The parkour is very very floaty. Almost all of the parkour is floating in the air and not sticking or related(?) to the build at all. Also, you should add more parkour variations instead of only jumping on blocks, fences and slime.

Once again, this is just my opinion on the map, not the official judging on the map.
And also, I hope that this post does not make you lose confidence in yourself, and I think that you should continue making more maps!
Good luck, choke_penguiin!

 

[Proteges]

Hey there, before going ahead with your map submission review I'd like to inform you that I'm only giving you my personal opinion/feedback on your parkour map submission and my personal feedback will certainly not affect your parkour map submission in the slightest, I recommend that you take in my feedback to improve your submission if there are any flaws, you don't need to and you're free to ignore me but anyhow, before going ahead I'd like to mention that I'm a Moderator, not a Map Judge so this is just my personal opinion and I am not accepting or denying your parkour map as this is only my personal opinion.

Originality/design ~ Unfortunately your map design/theme is not original sadly as Boris mentioned above, there are already a couple of months that have the same theme sadly. From looking at your parkour submission pictures and checking out your submission in-game on manacube I can clearly see that there's much more opportunity to add more detail to your animal and the surrounding, it's a little basic from my opinion at the moment.

Parkour variety/length/difficulty ~ Your parkour certainly has a fair amount of jumps to be considered an easy map but your parkour variety is quite lacking, for example, add different unique blocks to make your parkour more interesting and a little more of a challenge, for example adding trap door jumps, soul sand jumps, glass pane jumps, bed/chest jumps, head-hitters, etc would make your parkour more interesting.

Good luck!

 

[choko_penguiin]

Thank you for all the feedback! It's really helpful and I've taken it into account.

I've made some modifications to the parkour (more variety of blocks, details, etc.), therefore the screenshots above are no longer accurate. Just wanted to give a heads up

 

[IPattyI]

Hey choko_penguiin,

I'm sorry to have to tell you that your map has been REJECTED. As mentioned above, the theme "Desert Llama" is not very original as there are already multiple similarly themed maps currently on the server. I know what you mean by "taking a different approach" to the theme, but, they look very similar and this build doesn't add much that we don't currently have. The build is not very good due to the simplicity of the llama (the central focus) and the floating parkour surrounding it. You should try your best to work on making the central focus of your map as good and detailed as possible and integrate parkour as best as you can to it so it's appealing to the eyes. Regarding the parkour, the length and difficulty do fit the easy difficulty. Furthermore, I found the parkour to be evenly variated and enjoyable but I found it confusing at times due to lack of labeling of barriers. Good job, though, I hope to see more map submissions from you in the future!